I get a newsletter from an interesting site--Total Health Breakthroughs. Although I do not agree with with all the authors at the site. Some things really hit home with me. This article from this weeks newsletter spoke volumes to me. I wanted to share it with you. The author uses religion in his writings, but the info can apply to anyone on the basic level. This is his bio.
Dr. Matthew Anderson, B.A., M. Div., D. Min.
Dr. Anderson has been a counselor and motivational/inspirational speaker for the past 30 years. His desire is to provide spiritual advice and support to those who seek it within eDiets. He is author of "The Prayer Diet”. In his role as spiritual adviser at eDiets, Dr. Matthew Anderson devoted his time and energy to moderating his support group, called Spirituality and Weight Loss, wrote articles for the newsletters, held online meetings and answered individual questions in the Ask the Experts section. Dr. Anderson received his Bachelors in Philosophy from the University of South Carolina. He went on to earn his Masters of Divinity from Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky and finally received his Doctor of Ministry from Andover Newton Seminary (cum laude) in Newton Center, Massachusetts. In 1970, he was ordained as a minister in the United Church of Christ, a Congregationalist church. Dr. Anderson lends his spiritual guidance to others as they journey towards healthy living.
Every fat person lives in something I like to call a fat-box. Sadly, most weight-challenged people don't know it exists. And they pay a massive price in weight gain and low self-esteem. I can help you break out of your fat-box.
If you want to be forever thin, you need detailed information about your own fat-box, plus the proper tools for breaking out of it. The information below has worked for me (65-pound fat loss) and for many thousands of weight-challenged individuals. It will work for you too.
Fat-boxes are made up of attitudes, beliefs and old habits formed in childhood. They subtly and powerfully shape our bodies, our self-image and the way we relate to food and life in general. Most weight-challenged people remain trapped in the gain/lose/gain cycle because they are unaware of this fact. Therefore, the issue is not whether a fat-box controls your weight but whether or not you will confront and break out of it. Here's how.
First, identify the contents of your fat-box. Answer the following:
- Who wants you to stay fat? Most weight-challenged people are surrounded by family and friends who "enable" their bad eating habits and weight gain.
- How does staying overweight serve or protect you? From life, sex, your personal power, men/women, being visible, etc.
- How has being overweight defined your personality, your relationships and your self-expression?
- What would you do with your mind, your emotions, and your life if you were not constantly focused on food and fat?
Now, break out of your fat-box:
- Imagine what you will look like when you drop all that weight. Write a description and place it on your fridge.
- Imagine that you have all the power you need to face life as it is. How will this change your behavior?
- Write a letter to the people who want you to stay fat. Tell them that you are breaking out of your fat-box and that they no longer have any say in who or what you are. Do not mail it. Read it out loud to yourself every day for 30 days. This is an extremely powerful exercise. Take the risk of feeling foolish and do it!
To be successful at breaking out of the fat-box you will need courage to face some fears.Most weight-challenged individuals are deeply attached to being overweight and discover great resistance when they get close to their ideal weight. Your task is to refuse to attack yourself or decide that you lack will power.
The problem is not your will but your deep-seated attitudes about who you are and can be. The solution is in learning to create a new image of you and your possibilities that is not defined by your old programs. With some work you will be successful at breaking out and being forever thin.
This exercise is really eye opening. I looked around myself and noticed many who have tried to keep me fat in my life. Most notably was my last husband. e said he would leave me if I had the weight loss surgery. Well good riddance. Then my own sister had a problem when for the first time in our lives I was smaller than she was. Then there were the many friends I no longer associate with, former eating buddies.
Also looking back, I know my weight was a way to protect myself. For a sexual abuse/rape survivor, weight gain is usually something that happens across the board. It is a way of hiding from the world. I worked with my therapist for a long time when I was losing me weight. No longer having the weight to hide behind, I hid behind my fat clothes. Wearing a size 6x when I really wore a size 12. I am finally at a place where that is no longer the case. It took much work on my part, but hey,